Divorce is serious business. It changes everything in your life — and in the lives of your children and your extended family. You may have to relocate. Your children may have to change schools and leave their friends. There will be far less money available for everyone. Is divorce really the only option?

Clearly, no would should put up with physical abuse from anyone. The Family Courts and the divorce courts can deal with those issues in short order. But abuse in not necessarily physical. Your spouse may have a violent and uncontrollable temper — yelling in front of the children and throwing things against walls.

You may be married to a drunk — who doesn’t acknowledge it but who puts the entire family through constant misery. All the money is gone from the checking account. The car is wrecked. Everyone is to blame except drunk. The children are terrified. What to do?

Really, the first thing you need is a counselor. Friends can be helpful in listening, but you need someone who is trained in listening to you, helping you to understand your situation, and enabling you to make decisions about your own life. Marriage counseling can be very helpful, but if you are not first clear on who you are and what is going to work for you, marriage counseling is not to have much impact.

You first need to make a decision — how to live the next part of you life. To do that you need more than a sympathetic ear — you need a professional who can help you find out who you are and what is going to work for you. Only then can you answer the question for yourself — should I get divorced?

Video Introduction to Dealing With Emotional Issues in Divorce

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