Consulting and Coaching

When you are first trying to decide whether divorce is the best alternative facing you, who do you go to ask? Your friends all have their opinions, but they either have no idea what they are talking about or are trying to re-litigate their own divorces through you. They are excellent for emotional support and as a cheering section, but they really cannot give you useful objective advice.

Your therapist can help you understand what you need for your own emotional well-being, but few therapists are trained or experienced in the nuts and bolts of the financial and real-world implications of divorce.

You can go get a free consult with any number of divorce attorneys. They are experienced in the Courts and knowledgeable in the law, but even the most honest of them is unable to offer completely unbiased advice. Why? First, the job of an attorney is to be your advocate. Any attorney is going to paint as rosy a picture as he or she can of the positive outcome you can expect. That is not necessarily dishonest; it is the reality of advocacy.  Second, any attorney naturally sees the free consultation as a selling opportunity — that is what it is for. They are all in business and business is about making money. They are certainly hoping you will hire them. So, honest and knowledgeable objective analysis and advice is hard to come by.

We offer a different service. We can sit down with you, gather the facts about the marriage, what you hope to accomplish at the end, and offer you an unbiased assessment of the chances of your achieving what you want, what the realistic outcomes are, and what is likely involved in getting there in time and money. For a relatively modest sum you can be equipped to evaluate your case and what various attorneys have tried to sell you. You are then able to make informed decisions about how to proceed.

We can also coach you through the process. Again, at critical moments in the divorce process you have to make major decisions. Your friends can support you, your therapist can help you to remain on an even keel, and your attorney can advise you, but how to make the decision — you need knowledgeable independent help for that. We can coach you through each of those decision-making events. Again, we have no interest in the outcome and so can offer objective advice in helping you to make a decision.

I do not practice law any longer, but my over two decades of experience, including many trials before the divorce and family court judges of Long Island, my training in NLP and in Extraordinary Self Coaching, enable me to guide you through the decision-making process so that you come to a decision that comes out of your own needs, not those of your friends or your attorney.